Have a Seat...

Not you... Me.

I need to have a seat. The past 2 months, if I had a dollar for every time someone asked me "who are you?" (including myself) Barney would be paid off...

Now, don't get me wrong, I am not a stranger.I'm still the Sio that everyone knows and loves (I doubt anyone hates me. Im just too damn nice...lol). My personality is the same, but my actions haven't been my usual routine. Staying up past 1... like every night. Impromptu trips. Worrying about sh.t I ain't care about before, and being carefree about sh.t that used to give me a panic attacks. So I guess the answer to the question is " I am Sio, just like you never seen her"

In the mind frame of catching up on the things I missed out on or never had the opportunity to try...

Disclaimer- I don't regret any of it. I love David and being with him made me happy at the time. I wouldn't change missing the "best NYE party ever" for kissing him every at midnight in my PJs for anything. Its just now, I want to experience what I didn't have time too.

But I think in the mix of saying for so long "I am not about that life" I am doing to much. Lowkey, I have been about too many lives. I am not there to stay. I just wanted to test the waters. The partying every night, the random drives, the flirting with strangers... all tests. Some I like... Some I hate (partying and flirting with strangers is so not me. Im too chill and too shy. Too much for my ass too handle)

So its 3/4/11 at 1:37pm... I been single for 34 days, and its due time I have a seat.

I been doing the most. I don't want to loose me in all the f.ckery like I have seen so many do. I like who I am, and I don't want to change because I was too busy do any and everything. I am back to watching on demand. Staying home on weekends. Drinking my wine at night versus Moet I found in a hotel bathroom at 10am. Lol. I still plan on embracing life and trying new things. I will not be the Sio no one even invited to places cause they knew I was saying no, or the one who would be too nervous or worried about everything from consequences to people's perception. And though I am not stressing things cause tomorrow isn't guaranteed, Live Fast and Die Young was never my motto. I am definitely not about that life.

So to all y'all who been riding with me through all of this, giving me words of wisdom, holding your tongue and letting me get over this phase, or telling me "b.tch don't get crazy"... Thank you.

*sits in chair*