Sometimes I Wish I Could Act Like A Boy...

So, me and one of my best friends since 1st grade have a argument discussion on everything that is great on the other and we hate about ourselves. Here is an excerpt from our last convo:

Her- I need a perm (she knows exactly who she is right now)
Me- Girl, I just saw you and you didn't need a perm
Her- That's a lot of oil and brushing
Me- Your hair is always so well put together, if anyone needs a perm its me. I am out her looking like a teenage Puerto Rican Boy
Her- Please I can't go outside without makeup, my spanx, etc (I can't remember the rest of nonsense she listed)
Me- Please, I need makeup
Her- You skin is flawless
Me- No its not I am just to lazy to do my makeup in the mornings. You always have cute outfits on and look so put together. I am just sloppy...

It goes on for a while longer but you get the drift. Now my friend has a body people kill for.. literally. Her waist is practically non-existent, and she has a shapely lower body (and shapely isn't a word I'm using like people who are disproportionate use to sugar coat it; ie: fat + sugarcoating= thick). SN- We also do this with non-physical attributes such as love life, careers, etc., but I digress. Why the hell do we do this to ourselves? I am not saying I am going to stop but roll with me people. If Jesus Our Lord and Savior came down right now, put His hand on her shoulder and said, "My child, you are perfect", she would look at Him and say "Thank You Lord, but don't you think my lower half could be smaller?" (if you ARE reading this, don't hate me... I love you)

I have gorgeous friends. They know the aren't ugly but that won't stop them for complaining about any and everything that they think is wrong. One wants to get a nose job *side eye* yet her ass could be a model. We all have things we would change about ourselves. I would get smaller feet... their huge! And its hard finding shoes in my size! My toes are also long. My friend says the look like fingers...lol. I hate them but I am 25 and broke sooooo, they not going anywhere. The July issue of Essence (which I have been raving about) had a section dedicated to the great things about being a woman, more specifically a black woman. Although I am down for the uplifting and motivating of black society (Good Lord knows we need it), I think this is a gender issue, not a race one. I'm sure men are self conscious but it doesn't consume or hinder them like it does females.

Example- I am walking in Grand Central today when a gentleman approaches me. Here is a description so you can get a picture. He is no higher than 5'5 (I am 5'9), he has on a durag which I didn't even know men still wear in public, braids barely poking out from underneath the durag, and set of teeth I would consider betting that braces couldn't fix. Even if I was not happily engaged, he wouldn't even get a hello from me. I walked briskly away.

This man was plenty of things.... but the one thing he was not... BLIND! He knows he looks like this. He has seen a mirror in his 20+-30+ years of living. But he decided to take his chances even though the odds were against him. And they WERE against him. I looked cute today. I have on a navy blue pinstripe skirt with a cute white top (hair isn't done, but that's a different story). He didn't let his obvious obstacles hinder him from trying. I can't blame him. I actually admire him. First thing I learned in sales... IF YOU DONT ASK, THE ANSWER WILL ALWAYS BE NO! Men live by this rule. No matter what. He didn't know if I was blind, like them short, a whore, or had a rock bottom self... so he tried. I played him, but I assume he kept it moving.

I think women need to start adapting this philosophy. We are so scared to try things because rejection is something we try to avoid. We always feel more confident when we look good, this is a given. However, we cant let minor beauty issues stop our happiness. We pass by social events where our future husband may be at because we didn't get a fresh perm, or won't enjoy a day the beach cause we are bloated. Life isn't a patient boyfriend. Its not going to wait for us to get ready. Its coming whether we dressed accordingly or not. We have to stop worrying about or finger toes, shapely bottoms, or noses that look just fine and JUST. LIVE. LIFE.

PS. I dedicate this post to my feet...