Follow my Lead...

So I am reading this book @TiffThomp told me about.... " A Belle in Brooklyn" by Demetria Lucas. Its about a girl who moves to BK blah blah blah. I am not that deep into it yet. But, I was reading... came across a quote in my kindle, highlighted it, continued to read, but then came straight to the blog...

"...No real man is going to let a women lead him. You don't want the type of man that lets you lead. And if you don't trust a man to lead you, why are you dating him, anyways?"

Well damn.

I have had this convo before with others females. Some are all about the man leading.. and all are about the "I am every women" independent woman, i wear the pants role.

I actually and in the middle (i know, Im indecisive as shit).

I have enough male friends to know that they all believe they run shit. All. Of. Them. Even ones that clearly don't, and we make fun of them for it. Men need to feel in charge... and as a female (and someone who was in a fake relationship for 8 years) I understand that sometimes we have to take the L... We need to pick our battles. We do not have to nag/argue/get crazy for every little thing we feel we have no say/control in...

Example:
Him- I got us some Chinese for dinner babe

Her- I wanted pizza

Him- Oh, sorry... I picked it up already though. I got you your favorite from your favorite restaurant though

Her- NIGGA THATS NOT THE POINT. YOU NEVER TAKE MY FEELINGS INTO CONSIDERATION! YOU DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ME OR WHAT I WANT...



Wait.... Where did that come from? Bitch take the L... its all still junk food either way, and unless you pregnant, that ridiculous ass response is inexcusable. This may sound extreme... and you are thinking "who really does that?" But I have witnessed it with my own eyes... I even done some "WTF" shit too. You don't know you doing it til its done. Take a step back and realize that he did a nice gesture. He could of come home, hands empty, only thing he plan on feeding you with is in his pants. Appreciate the act, and cut some humble pie to go with that shrimp lo mein.


I think in an age where men are more open to express the fact they obviously aren't going to be serious with you, where the GAN (check the dictionary on the side) is more common that a relationship, no woman wants to be "submissive" to someone who won't even claim her. Or get lead by a man who is only going to lead her to heartbreak. Its a weird ass situation...so let me say this

I want an equal partnership, where both people have say and/or take turns leading. However, I also want love at first sight, no debt, and a body like Mya.


Cars don't have two steering wheels for a reason. Not everyone can take the lead. And unless you anal and keep track, someone is going to be in the lead more. Let the nigga drive b! Kick your heels off, close your eyes, and enjoy the ride.

In my opinion, this quote is true... except the dating part. I feel like the quote should read "... why are you in a relationship anyways?" You should be able to be lead by your significant other, but only after the commitment of a relationship. I am assuming you wouldn't be in a relationship with someone you don't trust...

Realize though, you don't need to follow every nigga. Would you let a stranger take control of some aspect of your life? No right, so why this nigga? Oh cause y'all having sex? Bitch please. Just cause his stoke game extraordinary don't mean his sense is! Just cause he know the curve of you back doesn't mean he knows whats best for you. Chose wisely mamita...

All Im saying, do not be the joint that gets talked about cause you can not make a move without your man. No matter how much a man wants to lead, he doesn't want to drag. If you are in a relationship, find an equal balance. Pick your battles...and realize that sometimes "you got to take the L to get the W..." (direct quote from Pastor Mack. Lol)